#open has changed the game of dating for individuals and couples within the world of ethical non-monogamy.
Making sure that our community members feel safe is one of our highest priorities. However, #open does not conduct criminal background checks on our users as we believe them to be invasive, ineffective, and misleading.
Use common sense and take reasonable precautions in all interactions with other users. There is no substitute for acting with caution when communicating with any stranger who wants to interact with you. Remember, online profiles can be falsified; anyone who can commit identity theft can also falsify an online profile.
When Connecting Online
Do Stay on the App
Stay on the #open app when building connections with new people. If something inappropriate is shared, you are able to report it immediately and block the person(s). It might be a red flag if someone tries to move the conversation to text, social media, messaging apps or email straight away.
Do Report Any Suspicious Behavior
We have in-app safety features that allow you to report any suspicious behavior:
- Fraudulent profiles
- Requests for money or donations
- Underage profiles
- Unwarranted nudes
- Messages of a threatening or harassing nature
- Spam or attempts to sell products or services
Don't Share Personal Information
Never include your last name, email address, home address, phone number, place of work, or any other identifying information in initial communications with other users. Stop communications with anyone who pressures you for personal or financial information or tries in any way to trick you into revealing it.
Don't Send Money or Share Financial Information
Regardless of someone else's situation, never send money, especially over wire transfer. Wiring money is close to impossible to reverse or trace where the money went. Do not share information that could be used to access your financial accounts. If a user asks you for money, we ask that you report it to us immediately.
When Meeting in Person
Do Share Your Plans with Your Friends and/or Family
If you choose to have a face-to-face meeting with another user who you met on #open, tell a family member or friend where you will be meeting and when you will return.
Do Meet (and Stay) in Public
When meeting someone for the first few times arrange to meet in a public place and stay there. Do not meet someone at your or their home. If you feel pressured to move to a private space and something doesn't feel right, leave.
Do Trust your Gut
If something just feels "off", trust yourself. You are not obliged to stay in an uncomfortable situation for any reason. It's totally OK to leave a date early if you're just not feeling it.
Don't Rush into Meeting Someone
We know that it can feel exciting when you are connecting with someone new online. Take your time to get to know someone before arranging to meet in person or connect off of the app. Perhaps schedule a phone or video call to screen someone before meeting them.
Don't Share Transportation
When meeting someone in person, do not agree to be picked up at your home. Arrange your own transportation so that you can be in control of when you arrive and leave. Making your own way to a meeting prevents you from having to share your address.
Don't Leave Your Drink or Personal Items Unattended
If you are drinking, be sure not to leave your drink unattended. Make sure that you only accept drinks that you are able to see being poured. A lot of the substances that are known as "date rape" drugs are colorless, tasteless and odorless. Also make sure that you know where your phone, wallet and other personal items are when on a date.
Talking about STIs is self-care, community care and sexy AF. Get tested regularly and get in the habit of talking about your status with new or potential partners. Make sure to use protection such as condoms or a dental dam to prevent the contraction of STIs.
It's a good idea to discuss boundaries and hard limits with a new partner before you become sexually intimate. Whilst you may have used certain hashtags to find people with similar sexual interests and kinks as you, it is important to talk about your wants, desires, kinks and boundaries to get on the same page - think of it as foreplay! Lay out some rules, some safe words, or whatever else you need to feel comfortable and secure with proceeding. This creates a safer container for pleasure and play that will fulfill your deepest kinks and desires in the most enjoyable way possible.
Consent is at the core of our community guidelines. Any sexual activity and play must begin with verbal consent that stays actively present through the whole encounter with regular check-ins. Checking in with your partner(s) verbally from time to time gives space for anyone to share if a boundary has been crossed or not. Be sensitive to body-language and do not continue if your partner(s) seems uncomfortable or unsure. When there is a history of trauma, flight, fright or freeze can sometimes inhibit our ability to communicate if a boundary has been crossed; giving people an option to opt-out can be helpful.
Consent can be withdrawn at any time for any reason. There doesn't even have to be a reason! Sex is never owed to anyone.
If your partner(s) is unable to consent because they are under the influence of alcohol or drugs, do not engage in sexual activity.
Within our community guidelines, we ask all members to play NICE. We appreciate all of our community members adhering to our safety guidelines and taking responsibility for collective care. All feedback and suggestions are welcome, we build our guidelines based on the experiences of our valued users.